Saturday, December 18, 2010

Christmas TIme

Merry Christmas, and happy holidays! Wishes for a profitable and fulfilled upcoming year. I hope you achieve all you want, or at least that you enjoy the next 365 days of the New Year 2011. May you make the most of it. May you make your own reality, and find the peace that comes from following your heart, and where Christ may lead you. That is my Christmas card greeting. I’m sorry, I am just simply not one of those missionaries who’s “on the ball” with e-greetings, etc. I guess I didn’t even think about doing that until now. I think you’ll understand, and bless you for doing that!

Today is the 18th of December 2010. Just a week from Christmas day. Having spent most of the last year here in Honduras, I am pondering how my view of Christmas might look slightly different here. I will be away from my family, and my normal traditions. Certainly no snow. Actually, I’m still not sure exactly how I will be spending the holiday. I will be spending it probably with the Martinez’, who have been my “host family” even though I do not live with them.

It’s strange. I see Christmas decorations, Christmas lights, wreaths, and even some Santa Clauses hanging around, but somehow I find it hard to find “the Christmas Spirit” this year. Or maybe every year one just has to choose to grab the warm fuzzies because circumstances cannot always yield them.

A friend from the church I attend has asked me to help with the Christmas Eve service, so I will be helping and re-oiling my rusty fingers to help play some Christmas hymns. It has been good for me. Sometimes I actually forget that I took 10 years of piano lessons, and that I know how to play music. (Thanks mom for financing that skill in me. I may have taken it for granted, but I am truly thankful for it, even now when I rarely get to use it.) Anyways, so I have been looking at the words of the hymns and trying to see what they might mean to Hondurans and also to myself, living in a different culture, with different rules to life. Here are some thoughts on them.

Away in a manger no crib for his bed. The little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head. The stars in the sky looked down where he lay. The little Lord Jesus asleep on the hay.
-Could it be that Jesus understands what it means to live in dirty, contaminated, unsanitary conditions? Where there is no clean water, and people sleep in dirt? Could it be that Jesus understands the little children who walk the streets, meanwhile the dirty corrupt politicians ride in their caravan of security guards, inside the security of their fancy car cages? Could it be that Jesus can resonate with the children in the villages who will never have the opportunity of education, and ability to improve their quality of life?

Hark! The herald angels sing, “Glory to the newborn King! Peace on earth and mercy mild, God and sinners reconciled!” Joyful all ye nations rise, Join the triumph of the skies, with angelic hosts proclaim, “Christ is born in Bethlehem!”
-Does the Christ child know what it is to not feel safe leaving your house after dark for fear of the danger and violence? And what is mercy mild? God and sinners reconciled. Not sure what that means either.

A new Christmas song was introduced to me, really beautiful medley that goes together with “Silent Night.” It’s words are pretty typical Christmassy style, but anyways, here they are:
Peace, Peace, Peace on earth and good will to all, This is a time for joy, this is a time for love, Now let us all sing together of peace, peace, peace on earth.
Man, where did these Christmas composers get the idea that because ions of years ago because a little baby was born that a certain time of year we would have peace on earth. That people might suddenly love each other, and stop needless violence. Maybe Christmas is a time where we just express our prayers for these sorts of yearnings. I have become recently very aware of the pointless violence that is raging here in Honduras. Less so here in Siguatepeque than in the big cities, but that does not mean that it isn’t still a problem in Siguat.
Last week I was able to make a trip to visit my friends Adam and Marisa Clymer Shank from my small group at my church “The Table” in Harrisonburg, Virginia, who are now on their own 3 year terms with MCC in Nicaragua. It was a great time to spend some meaningful chats and spending quality time together, also exploring the touristic sights around Managua. Ken and Sue Horst, my VMM tranSend director came down to evaluate my location, give some support, and then accompany me to Managua.
It was a good time of reflection and encouragement.

However, the trip also raised my awareness of the rise in corruption and gang violence. In talking with a “brother” from the church in Tegucigalpa (still in Honduras, on the way down) who drives taxi for a living, I was made aware of the reality. He told us the story of recently getting ‘attacked, or ambushed” by some gang members who took his money, and also demanded 20,000 more Lempiras (about $1,000, a whole lot to demand of any middle to lower class Honduran family) or his family would be the ones to “pay” for it. Of course, this all happened not without physical injury of breaking his clavicle. He had the sling to prove it. (Don’t ask me how safe it was for a broken-clavicle man to be driving, but we’ll disregard that fact.) The taxi driver cried a little bit that morning just in giving us a ride from the guest house to the bus station. I don’t know. It’s just hard to completely identify with that sort of circumstance. I have to deal with the violence by working around it. But for this man it is either work and take the risk of being robbed again, or stop working. Just circumstances I will never have to deal with. If I show up missing, the U.S. embassy will look for me. If I get robbed of all my money, I have a family and a support system that can pull me out. Blessings I have that people here just don’t. This world is so unfair. Why does my friend work from 7 am-7pm and make peanuts for wages, has to support his fatherless family, and have to share a room with his sister. Why did he lose his opportunity for education? Why do some kids get to go to bilingual schools and have the advantage of 2 languages, when the others get less than adequate education, of course only till 6th grade? This life is not fair.

I don’t tell this story to make my mother afraid for my safety. Don’t worry mom, I still live within the gates of the hospital bubble, and live a pretty sheltered life here. But I do reflect on this story, because it can be a pretty desperate situation! When you can’t get any taxi drivers to pick you up at 7 pm because the stop driving beforehand due to the danger of driving at that hour, you kind of get the picture a bit better. This guy said that if it happens to him again, they will have to take his life because he already loaned out all the money he could find to pay the last attack.
So back to my prior statement. “Peace on Earth,” perhaps is the prayer, the cry of the human heart, especially for those who live in a system where the mayors and leaders of the country walk hand in hand with the gang members, the drug cartels and police. It’s pretty hard to see that as anywhere near a possibility when people get guns pointed in their chest to take from them a $15 cellphone, or $10 in cash.

I think the hymn “O Come, O Come Emmanuel has a different meaning to me now that I am no longer in my comfort zone of Wellman, Iowa, or Harrisonburg, VA.
“O come o come Emmanuel, and ransom captive Israel, that mourns in lonely exile here. Until the Son of God appear. O Come thou dayspring, come and cheer, our spirits by thine advent here. Disperse the gloomy clouds of night, and death’s dark shadow put to flight. O Come, desire of nations, bind all people in one heart and mind. Bid envy, strife, and quarrels cease; Fill the whole world with heaven’s peace.”
Ah yes, Heaven’s peace would be nice. Even in my own soul, this hospital, Siguat, Honduras, Central America. The world.

As for a personal update, I again, have let my blogging get quite behind. As I mentioned, I got to take the trip to Nicaragua. I have been putting a fair amount of time into teaching and preparing. Teaching in Spanish is by far one of the most challenging, frustrating things I’ve ever done. However, it’s been a good review of my own nursing knowledge, and a good learning experience, and also special to be able to interact with the girls in this way. These girls are also my co-workers, so it’s kind of a strange experience sometimes, but I’ll take it.

About a week ago we had a Friday night party where the nursing students and the graduated nurses who all live on campus all joined up at the doctor’s house where I live to decorate the Christmas tree, eat pizza, watch a movie, play games, and just enjoy a fun evening. It was a fun event to be a part of. I will say though, the cookies were a disaster. But it was fun anyways. 

So it looks like I will be moving to my own apartment here pretty soon. I will still be on campus, but moving into my own little area. If only there was a Goodwill here!!! Apartments here do not come with refrigerators, counters, ovens, or anything. Pretty much a bare shell. So that’s a new challenge trying to find the best deals for these appliances. It’s an investment I wasn’t expecting for sure. I am hoping it will be a positive step for me here.

Hey, did you know it has now been almost been 10 months that I have been here? Thanks to you, my friend. For your prayers, thoughts, emails, and financial support. I am grateful for it. I may fail to keep everyone updated (obviously) but it’s just because I am trying to keep myself involved here, and I forget that maybe some of this stuff might be of interest to my loved ones at home. To be completely honest, having internet has very much kept me in touch with home, and sometimes has me missing the delights of home. But as a dear cousin states, “When in the U.S. we enjoy things that are of the U.S. When we are in Honduras, we enjoy the things of Honduras.” So I am blessed. My mom reminded me of how cool it is that I get to experience Christmas in a different country. How many get to do that? Best to take advantage of it, and enjoy it.
So what are the things of Honduras that I enjoy?
-Espresso Americano: a coffee shop chain that sells the best frappaccino for a about $1.25.
-La comida tipica: tacos, enchiladas, baleadas, flautas for very reasonable prices.
-Friendships made here
-the opportunity to learn Spanish
-Learning healthcare in another culture, and seeing how that works.
-The opportunity to travel a bit, also meeting other foreigners.
-Many others.

Anyways. I do hope you are doing well. You know what's hard? Investing in your current community, but also really wondering what is going on in the lives of your dear friends at home. It's hard for me. Facebook helps a little with that. But nothing, nothing nothing beats a good chat over coffee, a warm handshake a church, a hug at a family get-together. Maybe when I get back we'll have a chance to do that.

Anyways, thank you so much for reading this SUPER long blog update, and reading my musings, even if a bit jumbled. May the holidays be a special time, as you count your blessings, and enjoy where you are at.
Love, Malerie